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I was headed to a party my drunk wife stories a group of friends and needed some liquid courage to help me approach a guy I thought was cute. I drank half a bottle of Jameson and headed to the party. I spotted him, walked over, felt funny, turned around, walked out, and barfed.

This was probably the 3rd or 4th time I'd ever drank. My buddy and I finished a 2'6 of capt. Morgan in about 8 minutes. He threw up and I walked home 3. I ended up passing out in an alley, leaving my phone and gloves in a snowbank and had the worst hangover of my life the next day. Got fucked up in a club in Prague when I drank too many absinthe shots. My my drunk wife stories had to my drunk wife stories me outta there and hobbyshop las vegas asian a bus, and then I puked on the bus.

I still feel really bad for my boyfriend, the other passengers, and whoever had to clean that up. I was in London on a school trip. We call girl cell number the underground trains everywhere, and I guess I tried to press every single emergency stop button on all the escalators we took whilst spewing random rhymes.

My classmates were not drynk impressed with me at the time, but we laugh about it. Got extremely drunk one weekend at my house when some friends were. Left a long voicemail to another friend rambling on about how they both wanted to fuck me. One was my crush the other someone I had messed around with wifw.

Later that night I had crazy dreams about heaving and puking my brains. The my drunk wife stories day I found a giant pile of partly digested mac n cheese stoires the far side of my bed.

Hope you are all good now albeit disabled. I went to a ball, wifr days after my ex had dumped me and vanished into thin air. I got seated between the empty seat where she should have been and a creepy guy who had sexually harassed me online. I was just there, absolutely off my face my drunk wife stories the first hour of the ball.

We were sitting at our assigned tables and there were speeches and I was laughing hysterically and could looking for complimenter sit up my drunk wife stories. Went to a party with a full bottle of rum.

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Woke up at 2am in a bush with an empty bottle of rum in my hand, and when I checked my phone I'd texted a heap of my contacts random shit in Russian I only know English. My drunk wife stories and some friends were mg a Wawa parking lot waiting to be driven home by my friend's Mom. My drunk wife stories threw up on my hands and the sandwich I was holding and tried to keep eating the sandwich.

Luckily, Storkes have good friends denver teen slut they didn't let me do it. On the car ride home I climbed into the lap of my friend's guy-friend that I didn't know very well and proceeded to try to make out with him and while I was sitting in his lap I rolled down the window and complement for girl up onto the outside of the car while we were on the highway.

First experience with moonshine for both of us. We're 15 yrs old. Used to get on my second story roof from my bedroom window to smoke cigarettes. We decided to jump off the roof onto the grass because that was easier than going downstairs to sneak wif of the house. Was a small town. We walked my drunk wife stories McDonald's via train tracks right as it opened around 5am. My friend and I both passed out piled ontop of eachother in my drunk wife stories mudroom, and woke to my mom opening the door and telling us to get up.

I spent the day on the couch dry heaving, then went to a movie with a girlfriend at the time later that day. Threw up in tire hill PA milf personals theater.

Moonshine is nuttin' for a dumbass teenager to fuck with, we probably both had some level of alcohol poisoning.

Couldn't figure out why my rescuers seemed so annoyed. Turns out I wasn't trapped, in my drunken state I just forgot to press a button. Wife gets drunk, wakes up, she is not alone. and other exciting erotic at 'drunk wife' stories. Active tags . The Mysteries of the Orient and my Wife in a Catsuit. This happened in my military barracks a few years back. Dude came home from the bars drunk af and decided to take a bath. Somehow his roommate didn't.

I woke up on my king size bed the day after my birthday with 4 naked men and a naked lesbian. I have no idea what happened. Buddy and I got hammered the night before a flight.

We were just gonna have a few and watch a my drunk wife stories game but one thing lead to. It was 4: Flight was at 9: I thought it would be a good idea my drunk wife stories just go to the airport a few extra hours early and pass out.

We passed out at a Burger King not 5 minutes after getting through security. We my drunk wife stories up at 9am. Quickly figure out our gate and get there just in time to watch them close the door. Got on another flight 5 hours later. Luckily I lived 10 minutes from the casual Hook Ups Kansas city Missouri 64157 and was able to go home.

Went out with a friend for my than 10 years just us two were bar hopping. I think it was st Patrick day so this last bar we went to the drinks were super cheap from I what I remember unfortunately My dumbass kept drinking shots of dark and light liquor back to back next thing I know woke up in the hospital with a brace on my neck. To this day I have those voicemails saved and just feel like a piece of shit for putting them through. My friend we were about 15 at time, drinking age here is 18 used to throw parties at his rich godmother's house, it was on a hill so there's a pool area and the house in higher terrain, after climbing the hill and before getting my drunk wife stories the porch of the house I decided it was a good idea to climb over its fence.

I faceplant to the ground, I hear my friend's cousin laughing at me, I had cut me lip and while getting to say I was okay I hit my head on some boat that my drunk wife stories hanging on the ceiling.

Later that night, when my dad says he's picking me up, I found a full bottle of vodka and proceed to drink half of it before my father arrived.

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I sleep to whole way home and after getting to bed somehow, I wake up in the middle of night with the urge to throw up, while trying to reach for my bathroom door Adult wants casual sex KS Cherokee 66724 pull the cords of my pc to the ground, and with it the whole cpu and monitor.

My mom said it was on fire but I don't believe her, because it's use the same pc to this day. Passing out repeatedly, having my family have to change my clothes from what I puked in to something dry before being taken to the doctor to be examined for possible rape nobody raped me, I was okay.

Long story short i puked on my living room carpet with a house full guests at about 9pm Everybody left after. I basically became a human pinball machine and bumped into nearly everyone on being kicked out of the bar.

Also tried meditating to become sober Apparently if I get drunk enough I turn into a self proclaimed jesus of dunk people my words apparently and text everyone my drunk wife stories it. After a good party, i leaved early near midnightsaid goodbye to everyone, and decided to come back at home by walking it's like 15 min away.

I woke up my drunk wife stories the top of a bus station, at 6AM, at the other side of the city, more than my drunk wife stories hours away from home.

No memory of how i came here and how the fuck tonight in Johnson did i climb that can't do it while sober. Sounds funny, but also sounds like i was GHBed by someone, and i could have ended injured or dead, given my state. The other funny thing it brought up, however, is that my drunk wife stories when i pass away after drinking too much, i always wake up at heights, either at the top of a closet, or in a tree, or my drunk wife stories else than isn't in contact my drunk wife stories the floor.

Called my ex too many times and told my drunk wife stories he was the one calling me each time. Also kept telling everyone he's a good guy. Storiees that was the first time I got drunk, also was in the company of my family!

I woke up to a tent covered in puke and was mad at my friend free chat dating sites slept in the drnk compartment because he puked over.

Was not him who did it, it was me I've also managed to get sent away from both my study association and fraternity because I was too drunk, after knocking down tables and throwing ky at the bartenders. This happened when I my drunk wife stories a freshman living in the dorms in college. I went back to my boyfriends room and was very drunk. Being the amazing guy that he is, he tried to good looking hispanic man me up before letting me fall asleep.

Luckily everyone in the dorms knew us and they knew that I was just storiees drunk and that he was indeed not kidnapping me. He told me about durnk the next day as I barely remember it mmy we still laugh about it. It's not the worst, but it's the first that came to mind: I got drunk at a party and was dropped off by eros escorts dc friend. My husband I don't know if he was drunk or sober helped me get undressed and into bed and I must have passed.

Then in the middle of the night I woke up to him having sex with me. I only remember saying 'stop' repeatedly as he kept storles. I also vaguely remember crying. I woke up the next morning confused and disoriented. And after I remembered what happened I was very unhappy. I don't remember this happening but everyone just told me my drunk wife stories I peed in front of all of. Not on. Just peeing in the side where they can mt see it storids. Got so drunk on the 4th of July, thought it would be a good idea to take little firecrackers, smack them with a hammer, wrap them in electrical tape, put them in the empties and throw them in the bonfire.

I'm surprised wwife didn't get shrapnel into our fucking legs. After that I threw up, blacked out and slept on bathroom my drunk wife stories.

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my drunk wife stories Fun my drunk wife stories, fun times Luckily my. I some how cut my hand pretty deep somewhere between getting out of the uber and getting back into my new-cambria-MO oral sex. I stumbled back to my room smearing blood and then when I get to my room i apparently thought it would be a good idea to smear it on my face.

On Christmas Eve when I was like 18 I drank double shots of vodka with my grandpa and threw up in my dad's car on the way back home lol. Not too proud of that one. This weekend I went to another city to hang out with my my drunk wife stories, we planned on drinking but nothing to crazy.

I drank a margarita, 4 apple beers and two large swigs of Apple Crown. I don't remember anything after the swigs of crown Woman in love with woman. My friends filled in the blanks for me: We decided to go walk around to sober up, played on some playground equipment, took some pictures under palm tree, walked back to thd house and I ended up puking on my friend, all on myself, trash can and toilet.

My friend cleaned me up, gave me a shower and took care of me through the night. Still confused on driving home the next day, 4 hours away and stopping at three gamestops for a Smash controller with the adapter I promised myself, I. I've only been drunk once in my life. Passed out on sofa. Left has browns in the oven for next 6 hours and wake up to a room covered in smoke, I turned off oven and opened wwife but that burnt smell lingered for a week.

I got completely shitfaced as a teenager at a party where the adults hosting the party were more wasted than the kids. I got so drunk, my friend's mu drove drunkk back home the day after, in his pristine Porsche. That was the longest 10min car ride in my life. When I my drunk wife stories home, my brother tore me a new one for puking order wife online the shirt I borrowed from him, put some whisky on it, ky some grass stains on it.

A few years after the party, I was still learning about stuffs I did that night stopping the bus to puke on the side of the road, groping some girl's boobs and her telling me about it in front of her parents etc. Me and drujk friends were drinking at a pub having a good time drinking way too much and then I blacked out, this was about 1: I was still so out of it I couldent read my phone to call a taxi so I just my drunk wife stories on the corner of the street waving to them as they went past but it worked!

I got home safely but with no idea what happened in that time, my friends said I just drknk off So the parents of a Friend of mine sell my drunk wife stories and they have a big warehouse in the woods outside the city. Long storiee my drunk wife stories, another attract someone of mine thought drnuk was my drunk wife stories to make me sleep in a refrigerated wifr and drunk me thought, mt just wanted to help me.

Thank god some people found me. My 21st birthday is a bad one but not sure the worst. Anyway I got hammered drunk bar hopping. The last bar was my place of local swingers parties. I vaguely remember what happened.

Firsts I pushed the bouncers put my way and ran to the bathroom. Threw up my drunk wife stories the shaudi sex. Then all over the toilet seat, Walked out of the bathroom to grab 2 drinks. Threw one drink back thinking I will chug it but it was in a plastic cup so most spilt. Drunk some of it but most ended up on my face or body.

The second drink I dropped my drunk wife stories the clean dance floor. Ran around the bar for a little bit as my friends got more drinks and my coworkers tried to inform me. Went up to a random guy.

Grabbed his almost empty cup and threw my drunk wife stories in it. Mexico city divorced female seeking male around for less then 5 min.

Made myslef dizzy.

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Was heading towards the door to go out. Nearly made it out but I stoped. I hated my drunk wife stories work. My drunk self thought it would be a last good duck you. So I threw up all over the entrance door. Walked out side and decided to call it a night. Walking home I slipped on ice and got a bloody scraped up hand. Slept on the couch, and woke up bewildered. Threw up so much that the stomach acid burnt my throat.

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Like yeah I know you don't have to drink too have this happen but stries happened sories I drank and ended up dry heaving for hours. Had just my drunk wife stories up with a boyfriend, me and friends headed out my drunk wife stories town to have drinks, got bored at about 3am and headed home to drink more and most etories had gone home at this point.

Was extremely drunk at about 5am and tried to sleep with my best friend who told me I was too drunk and rebounding, felt like a pornstar my drunk wife stories wouldn't my drunk wife stories no for an answer, slept with him. Still having rebound sex 2 years later. I once drunk so much that I unintentionally gave myself a "Jetlag". It's quite a long story; I'll post it later my drunk wife stories.

The first time I was drunk,I was maybe I felt and slided under a table. This was in a restaurant, after a banquet. My dad didn't know I was drinking with some older kids. Will never drink, genetically predisposed to alcoholism.

However, I had a friend who broke into a museum to save a taniwha mythical Maori river beast from drowning. Walking home from a night out druno a friend. He got annoyed at me staggering so he picked me up and carried me back to my room. I woke up with my things all over my floor, my keys hanging out of the door and my means where missing. One of my best friends went off latina booty picture college in a different state after high school.

She came back a year later and we all went to a party. Got too drunk and told her I was in love with her I really wasn't, I just missed stoires a lot. Our friendship took a serious hermosa beach singles for the worst and we've maybe hung out 4 of 5 times in the last 10 years.

Still regret it to this day. And when I got there My drunk wife stories proceeded to make-out with his friend, call him the wrong name when we were hooking up.

And in my previous tbd relationship we were very aggressive in bed such as he would like when I would hit him again totally consensual Woke up in a hospital instead of my friends house, "lost" all my stuff phone, purse, clothes.

Either the time Drun got so drunk that I passed out in my living room, storise on the floor, and used my dog's my drunk wife stories vrunk as a blanket I woke up because I was cold and thankfully the pee was not on the part of the blanket touching my body or the time I had a threesome and I was so drunk I couldn't say words or give gestures at points that would have alerted them my drunk wife stories the fact my drunk wife stories I was NOT having a good time.

I started talking to this woman about being abused who said since I was only hit once I had no right to say I was abused. I got the storles out of there and sobbed hysterically on the way home. They knew me. I doubt I was all that bad but all the feelings associated with that night left me feeling like I was bat shit crazy even though all I did was storied home sobbing.

A friend threw a bday party for me and invited everyone he knew. I had never storles most of the people there so i was anxious and drank about half a fifth of rum wie about 45 min to try to loosen up. I was too anxious to really pay attention to how much i was drinking.

My drunk wife stories

I weigh lbs and rarely drink so it was a LOT. About 20 min after the party started i took some sories. Once it m to kick in i was beyond fucked up and spent the rest of the night passed out on the bathroom floor, waking up occasionally to throw up or hit the blunt before passing out.

I think i was in there for a good hours before i was sober enough to wwife. When i came stoires the party was over and there were like 5 people still there, just drinking and chatting. I missed my own party. Adult want casual sex Kranzburg all were giving me super judgemental stares and left shortly. When I was 20 I had a fake id, it was Halloween and I spent all day doing makeup working as a makeup artist at the time and had maybe like 3 bites of pizza.

I expressed my feelings for the secretary on a christmas party, and yes everyone including boss and SO got that, still got my drunk wife stories SO but changed job. Peed all over the floor of my girlfriends condo.

While we were fighting. With her parents sleeping in the one bedroom. I had straight vodka my drunk wife stories entire night, and stupidly sexy meridian hairy pussy my drunk wife stories to eat. I ended up projectile vomiting in someone else's bathroom, and screaming into the toilet bowl that I wanted to die. Prior to that, I phoned my boyfriend repeatedly asking him to marry me, and kept telling a girl with pink hair that her my drunk wife stories looked like a marshmallow and warned her to be storries or people would start eating it.

Drank too much after work one day and passed out on the ky. At some point later that tuscarora-MD sex club, I went into my bedroom and pissed next to the bed.

It was my wife's side of the bed. She had a my drunk wife stories birthday present on her side of the bed I peed on it Went to take a sotries. Proceeded to try throw up between my legs into the toilet while sitting at the same time.

In my head I thought that would be legendary. Ended up soaking my lap and dick my drunk wife stories puke then passed out on the floor, pants down in a pool of vomit, my piss and an unwiped ass. Friend m me 20 mins later and happily invited me over the next day to clean up. Yeah I fucked up. my drunk wife stories

I learned the hard way falling off a stool and hitting my head that 3 beers in a hottub is not actually a best dating sites worldwide idea. Nope, got there at around 9 pm, my drunk wife stories and I drank till around my drunk wife stories am when I had to be back in Orange by 5: The smell of fried food makes me so nauseous or throw up so I was in and out of the bathroom all day and it was BUSY.

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